Saturday, March 31, 2007
(my cousin, on the left)Tis barely the start of my spring break and I'm already bored. And just like two weeks ago, I am yet again urgeful to go out and have one of my night walks, or just do something unrelated to art. I would go out tonight but I aint got no money besides a dollar bill and a quarter I've saved up from last week. You want the truth? It's not fun to be 17, unemployed, and still living on my parent's house. While i could ask my mom for money, I doubt she'd give it to me and waste it on whatever I bloody hell want. That's not how it works in my household, unfortunately. My mom's idea of fun is working and paying bills and surely, I don't wanna do that yet and I don't wanna sit on the house all day either conversing with her; i've been damned recently, rotting away in my room besides when my friends call me up or I call 'em up to do something because i'd already in the brink of pulling out all my hair and possibly even shaving my head completely.
I've been hearing my mom and my aunt from London talking about my cousin Manda and I, over the phone. I dunno how it happens but every time she calls, their conversations will be linked to my phone's room and would hear 'em clearly. My aunt phone calls now became a morning-wake-up call for me which is good considering my alarm clock is not working very well...or maybe, i'm just deaf. But anyway, it's funny how they've been getting along lately and even found something in common, Manda and I. I hear my aunt whines about my cousin everyday--how Manda doesn't realized "hard-work", her constant socializing (drinking, smoking) with her english gay friends a pet peeve, irresponsibility and her disrespectfulness towards my aunt. Then of course, my mom would bring up: ME, although i'm slightly saner than Manda, who FYI i haven't met but already, i feel like I've known her all this time, they both would still find something to gossip about us. Should moms be damning their kids? I mean suurrreeee, its very hard to raise someone like me who rarely ask for anything, rarely say anything to her, and if i did, it would be something in the lines of "Yea" or "I dunno" and when we have our monthly arguements, they're like world wars but nothing that involves rifles and bombs. Thus, I came to an absolute conclusion that these women, my mom and my aunt are hating.
The first time i heard 'em talk about me, I was shocked and kinda pissed but hearing them conversing about how i'm so americanized, lazy and asks too much money(????? 10$ a week? that's not a lot, and I dont ask her. She gives it to me) everyday now is kinda funny and enjoyable. I admit, i'm very lazy when it comes down to doing my school works but, while I can sit here and finish everything in one day or even clean the whole house if that's what they want, I just don't wanna prove them wrong as of the moment. Just because I still don't have a job and of course, don't give her money just like my wonderful kissed up brother do every fucking friday, my mom dislikes the living hell out of me and thinks I aint doing anything but bum.
My mother does not know me at all. How could she know i'm not doing anything relevant of my future when in fact she's gone most of the time. SO i find it ridiculous for her to whine how lazy I am and trust me, she's not any better. But hey, I'm not to prove her wrong but if that's what will make 'em (aunt and mom) happy, then so be it. I'll work by my own means, period.
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Darn. I get carried away. what about my spring break? I wanna cry then commit suicide because it seems like its gonna be a big bang of boredom and a week of house arrest. Boo. and Art ain't helping either. I finished one, however, i still have 10 more to do which is a lot and i'm kinda running out of ideas; I decided that collages are soo last year. My art teacher gave me all that I deserved. I guess i now have to pay for my weekly procrastinations.
Anyway, If money was not the problem, i'm sure I'd have a better break. I'll figure something to do later, hopefully. But here's what i've been working on:
Labels: artwork, fake emo's dead, family affairs, stanky break
Blast that stereo, LOUD! {8:12 PM}
